IPW

A Scientific Curiousity

A peculiar event occured last weekend. As depicted in this blog, New York City was inundated by a cold dry white powder that fell from the sky. It is unknown at this time what this substance was or whether it will adversely effect the health of the people of the city. The media dubbed the powder "snow" and seemed to identify its effects as such; When traveled upon it became extremely slippery, leading to car crashes and falling pedestrians. It fell at such a rate and such a manner that it quickly added up upon itself, layer upon layer, until anything it was able to rest upon was soon deeply buried. In some respects it was similar to the substance known as "sand' but not as gritty nor was it restricted to areas near the beach. Another feature that distinguished the stuff from "sand" was that it was pure white, not tan, and contained no particles of shell-fish. Also it seems that "sand" does not fall from the sky though how it does get there is an unanswered scientific mystery.

Curiously, despite the streets being buried quite deeply, the city government was able to implement vehicles which had flat pieces of metal attached to the fronts of them to push the stuff to one side in order for traffic to commence shortly after it began to fall. As noted, this material fell from the sky, which has been know in the past to shed other materials on the ground below it, like water, icy round stones, gusts of air, frogs, bolts of electricity and now this fine white powder. Why the sky sheds these items remains a mystery to this author, and perhaps to many scientists as well.

Strangely enough, as quickly as the substance came it is now beginning to disappear. It is not, as you might expect, flying back up into the sky but is simply vanishing into thin air. There are puddles of water on the ground in its place, which I can only assume were there before the stuff began to fall, being trapped beneath it as were the cars and the items of flotsam it covered. There is some speculation that the material is actually somehow transforming itself into the water but this to me seems like superstitious alchemy. One might also put forth that the substance is transmorphing into cars, since they too are revealed as it disappears. Though a nice way to get a new car, I clearly remember many of them being there when the powder began to fall in the first place and it will not do to simply take them as manna from heaven.

At the rate the "snow" is disappearing it seems it will be too late to further investigate its nature, leaving only a memory of the mystery behind and revealing the other unsolved peculiarities of the earth in its place, such as the green pointy needles that are in great abundance in the parks, and must be cut regularly if they are to be stopped from taking over completely.

Onto other matters. Today is the 32nd anniversary of my birth. Though I don't remember the moment clearly, it was on this day 32 years ago that I first drew breath on my own and walked down to the coffee shop on the corner. I am, as mothers will be quick to calculate, 384 months. At this stage in my growth I am able to dress myself, feed myself (with the help of my lovely wife and my debit card) and reach the top shelf to grab sugary treats. I can talk and walk simultaneously. I feel lucky to have made it this far. The farther I progress though, certain career opportunities are put out of reach. I will never be a pro-athlete. I will probably never be President. I won't become a dentist. Or at least, a licensed dentist. In short, the paths open to me, which at the moment of my birth were plentiful, are mostly no longer open. Some options still are available, including: Alchoholic, unemploed gigolo, ditch-digger, Egotist, Prison Inmate and psychic crime solver. With these options open, I feel much less claustrophobic then I did a moment ago.

Thank you for your wishes, and your condolences.

Posted by ian at February 16, 2006 05:52 PM